Being an Adult

dandelion

(source)

Being an adult is weird. When I was younger, I was desperate to be an adult. Now I am one, I'm still desperate to be one. I don't feel like an adult, even though the trappings are there - the flat, the job, the responsibility, the age, the ability to drink in bars. I wonder if I'll ever feel like one. I'm certainly enjoying being an adult - having disposable income and no curfew is the best - but I definitely feel like I'm playing at it.

What is it that make you an adult? Age feels like an arbitrary number most of the time; for some reason when you're 17 years and 364 days you're not deemed an adult but at 18 years and one minute, you suddenly become one and are allowed to do important things like own credit cards and vote for the next government. I look at my parents and they are adults. There's no which way about it. My grandparents are even more adult than that. Maybe it comes with experience, or maybe it's a sense of mind. I wonder if they feel as adult as I think they are?

As I continue to make more and more decisions about my life, it feels more and more important to act like an adult. I have to act like an adult and save my money, rather than spending it on lipsticks and shiny shoes. I have to think about whether I want to buy a house and what I want to do with my career. I talk constantly about how I want a puppy, but you definitely have to be a responsible adult to own a dog. It all feels like a lot, and whilst sometimes I think I'm nailing it, at other times I very much feel like I'm pretending.

I feel like an adult when... 

  • The bathroom and kitchen are clean
  • I can answer questions on University Challenge
  • People compliment my baking
  • I go to my friends' weddings
  • I can give my sister advice about Universities
  • I wear high heels
  • I cook a successful roast dinner
  • I don't get ID-ed at the supermarket buying wine
  • I know what kind of wine to buy from said supermarket
  • I have an opinion on mortgage rates and housing prices
  • I don't have to sit on the kids' table at family events

I don't feel like an adult when... 

  • I spill things down my top (frequently)
  • My shoes have watermarks and scuffs on them
  • All I eat all day is Salt & Vinegar Pringles
  • My nails are chipped (always)
  • I hold my friends' babies
  • I fall over in high heels
  • I chain watch Jersey Shore at the weekend
  • I cry at Harry Potter
  • Something serious happens and I don't know what to do
  • I wear business dress (does anyone else feel like a fraud in a suit?)