PHOTOS BY JENNA WOODWARD PHOTOGRAPHY
One whole year and one day. That’s how long we’ve been married. A lifetime and no time at all.
How wonderful, truly, it is to be loved. In any capacity. Our wedding was not just about the love that I have for Paul, and that he has for me, although that is part of it. It was also about the love that we have for and from our families and friends.
But how ridiculously lucky I have been, and still am, to love and be loved by Paul. I couldn’t have asked for a better person to look after my heart and to be on a life-team with. That has been proven to me time and again over this year, at times big and small. People say that marriage is hard, and that the first year of marriage is the hardest – but for me, the opposite is true. It is easy to love and be loved by Paul, and I attribute that far more to his spirit than to mine, which is high-maintenance at best.
I have no doubt that there are far more storms in our future for us to weather than there have been in our past. Sometimes I worry about what is to come – at times it feels like I’m using up all of my quota of happiness all at once, and that stressful times are just around the corner – but I’m hoping that’s just my general anxiety trying to spook me rather than a real premonition of the future. That said, life is full of things both trying and truly wonderful, so we can only hope that the latter outweighs the former.
I often think about the way that Paul and I met, and it weirds me out that we ended up here. For him to read my blog all those years ago and to take a chance on sending me an email, and for us to end up married? I could never have imagined it, but I am so grateful for it. The Internet has brought me so many things, but Paul is the best one of them.
I can only apologise for the soppy nature of this post – it’s certainly not my usual fare. I want to share some wisdom on a year of marriage, but what can I possibly share? It’s a lifetime but also no time at all – and I feel I’ve learnt nothing, really. Nothing that will be of any interest or help to you, anyway. I hope to stand here (or stand somewhere – who knows how the Internet will look by then?) in fifty years and really have something to share, but until then I’ll just think about how lucky I am.